Am I actually a girl?

It appears that after almost 30 years of life I am finally starting to become like other girls. Recently I started purchasing or looking at things that are really rather girly that I have never really had any interest before. For example, I have suddenly become a girl with a lot of shoes. I used to pride myself on being a girl with only the minimum required pairs of shoes. Now there are shoes all over my house, I am constantly trying to figure where to put them so that they are out of the way. When I went to Florida for Christmas I brought 5 pairs of shoes with me because I couldn't figure out which to eliminate and then I bought 2 more pairs while I was there.

Also, I recently discovered that I do like candles, or at least I like the way they make my house smell. And then the skirts - for BSF I am required to wear a skirt (or suit pants of which I don't really have any that fit and you don't really find suit pants on clearance) so I now own quite a few skirts. In fact I now own enough skirts that I could really stop buying them but I still find myself looking at them whenever I am out clothes shopping. (So far very few of the shoes go with any of the skirts but I believe that soon the new skirts are just going to lead to more pairs of shoes.)

Then this morning a woman who goes to the same Curves I do was selling necklaces that she makes out of beads. And I actually looked at them, I even considered buying one. I have not worn any jewelry other than a watch in years and even when I did wear a necklace it was always the same one and rather plain.

I am not sure what has gotten into me lately. But don't worry I still don't like the color pink. And last night one of my friends was telling 2 of us that Target has some cute shirts with hearts on them on sale - and the thought of me going and looking at them made me sick.

Well, that makes it easier

This morning I came into work to find out that my co-worker that drives me crazy quit over the weekend. I didn't really expect him to quit; based on recent behavior I thought the company may let him go but I didn't think he was going to quit. I am trying to not be too excited about this and I refrained from a doing a jig when my project manager told me this morning but I am really quite happy about it. One of my co-workers even remarked that he thought I looked more relaxed despite all the work that I have to get done.

I thought God had a lesson there for me to work through, and maybe he did, it just didn't last as long as I expected.

An Overwhelming Task

Sitting next to me is the stack of pictures that I choose to print from my trip to Europe trip. Between the 3 of us we took a little of 2,050 pictures and I had intended to print about 25% of them. Instead I printed 803 of them, or 39%. The pictures create an 8" stack.

I don't intend to use all of them but I couldn't really narrow it down any further on the computer screen. Well, I guess I could have but I didn't bother to add up how many there were until I was done. Now as I look at this stack I find that I the idea of scrapbooking them seems overwhelming.

But I must admit it is not the most overwhelming task I am currently looking at. I have to clean up the spare bedroom which is where I will do the scrapbook and this involves re-organizing the closet in that room. It is a rather large closet and I use it for storage but I have discovered that I am currently trying to store much more stuff than I was when I first moved in 4 years ago so the current organization scheme I was using is no longer working. In doing this I am going to also re-organize my desk and the closet in the hallway. But still I can't really explain why I am more over-whelmed by the idea of an afternoon task than by a task that will probably take over a year (my joke has been 3 years).

Maybe because I am not sure when I will actually have a spare afternoon to work on the closet and the idea of a year whole of scrapbooking is much more fluid. And the obvious that scrapbooking sounds much more fun than cleaning and organizing. Also lastly, because I am no stranger to craft projects that last me years. If you don't believe me stop by sometime and I will show you a few.

A New Attitude

I have heard it said that you can change your own attitude. I have always questioned that to some degree because I have never managed to have a lot of success with my own ability to do that. Or at least not things that I any real strong emotion tied to.

In the last week I have decided that there are two things that I need to change my attitude about, both concerning work. The first will be a little easier - it is my attitude towards working longer hours. I tend to get grumpy about it and make sure that all my friends around me know it when I am. This does not help me get through it and by the time whatever project that is causing the extra hours goes out the door I am pretty cranky in and outside of the office. My course of action on this is to just accept that I have to do and not think about the other things that I could be doing instead of working. And of course pray to stay positive during these times.

The second is going to be harder because it has been festering for a while. The guy who sits next to me drives me crazy. He started in April and about 4 hours after he started I wanted him to go away. Now 9 months later I still want him to go away. He also now he has issues going at home which makes him even more fun to be around. Last week they sent him home for a day, I started to think that maybe I would get my wish. After he returned I decided that I had a horrible attitude to this guy and maybe I should work on changing that. In the last few days I have managed to find some compassion for him in his current situation but I also need to find a way to have a conversation with him. In the past I have either ignored him because I tend to be argumentative with him. I have prayed for him this weekend and I also prayed that I can learn to get along with him. And now I just have to trust in God to have the Holy Spirit work through me because I do not have the strenght or power to suddenly like this guy.

My Christmas Vacation

My company closes the office between Christmas and New Year's so as an adult I still have returned to a life of having a Christmas vacation. So this year for Christmas my brother and his family and I traveled to my parents home is Sarasota, Florida where we had a wonderful week. While a lot of the country, including Denver, experienced the dream of a white Christmas, I thrilled to say that it was in the high 70's on Christmas in Sarasota. In fact we went for a boat ride that included a nap.

The week included lots of reading, sleep, walks on the beach and even a swim in the Gulf of Mexico.

On Sunday I returned to the snow and cold of Denver and tomorrow I return to work. In some ways I am ready to return to the routine of everyday life but I am sad that it is ending. But I am grateful that I had the week off without having to take vacation time.

LEGO's

Growing up I always wanted Lego's but never managed to receive them so in my early adult life I went through a Lego phase where I would buy myself Lego's, specifically Star Wars Lego's. This weekend I was at the Curves I workout at and they had gift tags with a child's gender, age and something they wanted. I happened to find a 12 year-old girl that wanted Lego's. As girl who grew up wanting Lego's but never received them I was all over that.

Later in the day I found myself in the vicinity of a Lego's store and seeing how I had just agreed to buy some Lego's I went in. Maybe this was foolish, but I didn't really expect to want to buy any for myself. I did find a set of Star Wars Lego's that I wouldn't mind adding to my collection but I didn't seriously consider buying. Then after I purchased my gift on the way out a noticed an Eiffel Tower set, I am not sure how I didn't notice it before because they had one set up and it was really quite tall. I didn't like Paris nor did I really enjoy being on the Eiffel Tower (the whole fear of heights got in the way) but for some reason I found myself looking for the price. I am not really sure why there is no way that the set was in a range where I would actually pay for it.

But then one the way out I thought to myself, "This is why I need to have boys." My next thought was along the lines of terror of having a girl that actually liked girly things because I don't think I would have any idea of what to do with that. But for now, once my nephews are a little older I can buy them fun Lego sets. And now I am pondering taking apart one of my sets so that I can put it back together.

This is going to be fun, right?

This week at work I was asked if I could help out with another project for a few days. I had been warned by my project manager that we had a lot going in December and I this would likely happen. But what specifically they asked me to do surprised me. Tomorrow I am flying to West Virginia as a part of a team of 4 from my company (and I am the only female on the trip). There is an existing building there that we are doing the renovation on so we have to go out there to look at what equipment and such is already there.


On Friday everyone at work kept asking me if I was excited about it. My honest answer to that is yes and no. I think it will be fun to be out of the office and go somewhere new for a few days. It will also be nice to get to know some of my coworkers better. I don't any of the other 3 going all that well. That also brings to why I am not so excited about it. I don't know these guys all that well and that is going to be a lot of time with them. Also, I look forward to flying so that I can sit and read for several hours but now I am going to be sitting next to a coworker so are they going to expect me to interact? Of course there is the wondering of how many hours we will be working - 8,10,12? And what we will do at night when we are done working? But if we survived Europe without any trauma I can survive West Virginia with a few coworkers for a couple of days, right? I am just trying to go into this with a open mind. Only time will tell...